These three traditions don’t share a money model, so there’s no single number to give you. Quaker weddings have no officiant at all, and no fee — only an optional donation to the meeting. Unitarian Universalist ministers charge fees like most clergy, following a published scale. Humanist celebrants are paid professionals whose rates track the open wedding-officiant market. Treat each one separately.
Quaker weddings: no officiant, a meeting
In the Religious Society of Friends, there’s no minister to hire and no one standing at the front performing a ceremony. The couple marries each other during Meeting for Worship — after a period of silence, they speak their own vows, and the gathered meeting serves as the officiant in every sense that matters. A wedding certificate, usually large and hand-lettered, is read aloud and then signed by everyone present as witnesses to the marriage (Friends General Conference).
Getting to that point involves real process, just not a paid one. A couple asks their monthly meeting to take the marriage “under its care.” A Marriage Clearness Committee — at New York Yearly Meeting, four members of the meeting — meets with the couple to talk through readiness for marriage, similar to what pre-marital counseling covers elsewhere. Once the meeting approves, a separate Oversight Committee is appointed to attend the wedding itself and make sure it follows Quaker practice. The monthly meeting clerk is the one who receives the couple’s initial written request (New York Yearly Meeting).
None of these roles are compensated — they’re volunteer responsibilities meeting members take on for each other. Where money does show up is the meetinghouse itself. Portland Friends Meeting allows members and attenders to use the building for life events, including marriage, “for a pay-as-led donation,” separate from the posted rental rates charged to outside groups (Portland Friends Meeting). Newtown Friends Meeting’s marriage-committee guidance puts it plainly: non-members are charged a clear rental cost, while members and long-term attenders are asked for a donation “ideally close to the rental cost” (Newtown Friends Meeting).
Neither meeting publishes a dollar figure for that donation — it varies widely by meeting and by what “pay-as-led” means for your own finances. Ask your meeting’s clerk or oversight committee what’s typical there.
Unitarian Universalist ministers: fees and honorariums
Unlike Quaker meetings, UU congregations have ordained ministers, and those ministers generally do charge for weddings — this is standard clergy compensation, not an oddity. The UUA points couples and ministers alike toward the Unitarian Universalist Ministers Association’s guidance on fees (UUA: Weddings).
The UUMA’s published “Scale of Fees for Professional Services” sets wedding fees by regional cost-of-living index:
- Geo Index 1–2: $450
- Geo Index 3–4: $500
- Geo Index 5–7: $550
- Or 10% of the total wedding budget, whichever is higher
Ministers are also told to weigh local norms and prevailing local rates, and that a popular wedding-destination area may justify a higher fee than the base scale (UUMA Scale of Fees).
That fee structure is mainly aimed at couples from outside the congregation. Per UUA’s own compensation guidance, ministers serving a congregation generally offer rites of passage — weddings included — free to their own contributing members, and reserve fees for non-member couples who ask them to officiate (UUA: Ministerial Compensation 101). If you’re a member, ask directly whether a fee applies before assuming the scale above is what you’ll pay.
Humanist celebrants: certified, fee-based
Humanist celebrants are non-religious officiants trained and credentialed to perform weddings, memorials, and other life-cycle ceremonies without religious content. In the US, that credentialing runs largely through The Humanist Society, which has ties to the American Humanist Association’s celebrant training work — the AHA has run dedicated wedding-celebrant training series under its own banner (American Humanist Association: Humanist Celebrant Training). The Humanist Society’s own page notes that Humanist Celebrants “are generally recognized in all states and many countries,” with the caveat that marriage laws still vary by state and county, so it’s worth confirming your celebrant is authorized to sign your license where you’re marrying (The Humanist Society: Humanist Celebrant).
Unlike Quaker donations or UU fee scales, humanist celebrants set their own rates as independent professionals — there’s no single published national number. One celebrant’s pricing page compiles industry averages from several booking platforms: WeddingWire around $300, WeddingOfficiants.com in the $500–$800 range, and The Celebrant Directory spanning $150–$1,000 (Humanist Celebrant Orlando: Pricing). In practice, expect something in the $150–$1,000 range, most commonly $300–$800, with cost driven by how customized the ceremony is, whether a rehearsal is included, and the celebrant’s experience.
Comparison table
| Tradition | Who officiates | Is there a fee | Typical amount | Who it goes to |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Quaker | No one — the couple marries each other in Meeting for Worship | No fee; an optional donation is customary at many meetings | Varies widely — ask your meeting | The meeting (often tied to meetinghouse use) |
| Unitarian Universalist | An ordained UU minister | Usually, for non-members; often waived for congregation members | $450–$550, or 10% of wedding budget if higher | The minister, per UUMA’s fee scale |
| Humanist | A certified humanist celebrant | Yes — a professional service fee | $150–$1,000, commonly $300–$800 | The celebrant directly |
Tipping at the reception
Everything above covers the ceremony and the officiant (or lack of one). The reception is a separate question with its own standard practices — see the full vendor tipping guide, the officiant-specific guide, and the wedding tipping cheat sheet for caterers, bartenders, and the rest of your vendor list.
The bottom line
There’s no one answer here because these three traditions run on three different systems: Quaker meetings take a donation, not a fee, and the amount is genuinely local; UU ministers follow a published scale that mostly applies to non-members; humanist celebrants charge market rates like any independent professional. Confirm which model applies to your ceremony before you budget for it.
Sources
- Friends General Conference — Weddings
- New York Yearly Meeting — Marrying Under the Care of Friends
- Portland Friends Meeting — Rental Information
- UUA — Weddings
- UUMA — Scale of Fees for Professional Services
- The Humanist Society — Humanist Celebrant
- Humanist Celebrant Orlando — General Price List
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